~X~ Fix Your Eyes ~X~: Chapter One

DISCLAIMER: I do not own My Chemical Romance.

Author's Note: All right, I'm on a roll. A post a day. This should continue on for a while, as I have a lot to add onto here.
I wrote "Fix Your Eyes" for my wonderful friend Mary. She and I are both huge Ferard fans, so I was really giving both of us a gift when I wrote this. I had a lot of fun with both this and the sequal, "Take Your Gloves". The currently unnamed third story is one I'm going to be starting very shortly, as I need it to be done by Mary's birthday.
Like I said, I really liked writing this story, so hopefully that reflects. Hope you like it.

Name: ~X~Fix Your Eyes~X~
Pairing: Frank/Gerard (My Chemical Romance)
Genre: Romance/Angst
Rating: PG-13


Chapter 1. Deserving
GERARD
I stared at him. I couldn’t help it. I don’t think I’d ever seen anything quite so beautiful in my life. Curled up beneath the sheets, with black hair - normally so perfectly combed to the side - mussed and untidy. Those big, puppy dog eyes, a pale brown, closed in sleep. Defined pink lips parted slightly, angelic puffs of breath escaping. His pale face nuzzled against the pillow. His small, rounded nose wrinkled. Frankie was so cute when he slept.
And, tragically, I didn’t deserve any of it.
I didn’t deserve his praise. I didn’t deserve his affection. I didn’t deserve the soft way he smiled, or the way he held my head up after a long night of drinking. It was so unfair.
I was being unfair, too, but in a different way. Frankie didn’t deserve his “responsibilities” - making sure I was okay when I’d had too much to drink, making sure I never took too many drugs, making sure that I stayed alive. I was unfair because I made him cry, made him worry, and made him take care of me when I was old enough to do it myself. But he was unfair to himself, because he always let me take advantage of him.
Maybe that was Frankie’s idea of love - sacrificing everything you have for the other person, no matter how fucked up they are. Well, I was fucked up, and Frankie just didn’t need me. Not when he had Mikey, Bob, and Ray around.
I kissed his cheek, just soft enough to keep him asleep. He smiled in his sleep, a small smile, and murmured “Gerard” as he hugged his pillow.
I got up and walked to the kitchen, just to fuck myself up again.

Author's Note: I know it's short. A lot of the chapters in this are. I like to think that it picks up pretty quick, however. So, please, leave a comment and email my blog to every person you've ever met. (I'm a comment whore and unashamed.)